Saturday, December 25, 2010

We wish you a dainty Christmas!

Well, its that time of year again. I wanted to let everyone know I survived my road trip out west (Pittsburgh). Traffic was light and it went fast.

I came home to fresh sushi from Whole Foods and a big box of Tea's Tea (green/jasmine).



(Wine party, in Kutztown, photo above with beloved housemates of 233)

It's a low-key Christmas, minimal gift exchanges, etc. I prefer this.

To my surprise my aunt and uncle showed up and we're currently cooking a chicken, lasagna, and some sweet potatoes. I've already finished one big bottle of Tea's Tea. I will enjoy another one on my return trip back east. Everything is quite relaxed. I've been well behaved and I've been sleeping alright.

Upcoming Events of interest to all locals and others who read.
***December 31st @ 233 Noble Street, Kutztown, PA - 8pm - New Year's Party w/French Canadian theme. If this is anything close to the yacht rock party then we're all doomed.

***January 8th @ The Funhouse, Bethlehem, PA - 9pm or so - TQI, Dan McGonagle, and Wet (LIVE MUSIC)

Please show up at any or either....these will be good times...start your 2011 the right way.

Have a good holiday, hopefully it was enjoyed in peace and moderation. Rise above the other bullshit. May we all work towards non violent and non coercive solutions to the problems we face as a country and a world. G-Bless.

DB

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Ducks


One of my favorite meals is Peking Duck. My goal for my three-week break is to learn how to cook a Peking Duck. It's a time consuming, but not impossible process.

I did a quick search for ducks and this site came up:
http://www.efowl.com/Pekin_Duck_p/1001.htm

I never thought about it, but raising a duck seems affordable ($4/bird) and doable. This got me pretty excited. Maybe this will be my first pet, that I could end up eating. I then did some research on raising a duck.
http://www.liveducks.com/care.html#shelter

I think the biggest obstacle, other than convincing my housemates, would be building a coup or space for the thing to keep 'eem out of harm's way. Dogs, foxes, owls, snapping turtles, and other creatures enjoy eating duck as I do. My other concern would be that the duck would turn into an alcoholic living in our house. I wonder what their tolerance is. Has anyone ever made a duck drunk before?

Aside from all of this, I'd need to check to see if its okay to raise one in our town. Our town has a lot of foolish regulations and I wouldn't be surprised if there was problem with that.

My final plans for this potential duck would be to have the thing slaughtered (tits up), and then cooked in a proper manner, Peking style. I could see this as being a fun project.

I will let you know if I go ahead with this.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Who shops at department stores?



We used to go these places a lot. We had Kauffmann’s, Sears, Hornes, JC Penny and Gimbels. These multi-level stores were/are located downtown or are connected to a big mall. Where I'm living now, we have Boscov’s. These institutions are filled with mediocre high-priced clothing, shoes, sporting goods, furniture, kitchen and god knows what else. Just lots of nicely packaged overpriced material shit ready for consumption.
During Christmas Santa would make a visit. I was always afraid of Santa so I didn’t participate and threw a tantrum when it was my time to go. I was shy and shyness is nice.

I liked looking at the stuff and I liked the snack bar. In the 80's I was always trying to score some corduroy "OP" shorts or a nice stylish Polo oxford or necktie. The upstairs of these places were most likely filled with furniture and televisions. We'd often play hide and seek between the racks of women's clothing when I was even daintier than I am now. These were/are big places and easy to get lost in.

The look and feel of these places doesn't change much. Their clothing selections are so so. Their prices seem to be high in light of this horrible economy and way better selections and prices online.
(((I could get a better deal  on something I grabbed at TJ Maxx, Marshall's or Goodwill.)))

In defense of these places many of them were located in the downtown area and it gave a reason for people to head into the city. As it is now and for many years, we're spread out and many of these mega-stores are parts of malls in the sub burbs which is one of many reasons why many cities are lifeless.

In closing, this was written because I believe it's hard to separate our bastardized Christmas holiday from these types of stores. They both feed off of each other. If I walk these stores now, I get flashbacks to the days when I thought these stores and merchandise were all the rage. Finally, I just find it very hard to see their value in an age where we can shop for everything at our fingertips.

Never underestimate the American public.

Let's move on people. Leave these things behind.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Sayings and Expressions that I don't like.

On the radio there was a story going around on a poll done on the expressions Americans hate most. This inspired me to come up with a list of my own. Enjoy.

These are not in any specific order. Some are general, some are political, some are....whatever.

It is what it is.
This gets thrown around a lot as if its some profound statement. I heard an old boss say it once in a business meeting as if she was unveiling something unique.

I had an ah-hah moment!Like they had an epiphany. Maybe it gets said a lot in church basements. I don't like epiphany either. I think Glenn Beck said that the other day. Glenn and Beck are other words I don't like when they're together.

Pro-Life and Pro-ChoiceBullshit terms from both sides of an emotional debate.

Playmaker
Sportsmedia are not too intelligent. They use the same stupid terms as everyone else. No one tries to be original. Playmaker is one of those terms. They had a TV show/sports soap opera on ESPN named Playmakers. Needless to say it was a stupid program.

Taxation
Another term for legalized theft.

I love you.
Maybe the most abused phrase of all time. Once you confess that to someone you might as well ask them to shit on you 'cause they now have the power.

Homeland Security
Another nice bullshit term from the government. This is used as a really good excuse to spy on people and steal your rights. Shit.

Put that thought out of your mind.
A common phrase my dad would say to kill any idea or far-fetched dream I ever had....like owning a Ferrari. I hated to hear it so much from his voice. He said it quite well. Good delivery dad. I remembered it.

Hope.
I now think those who bought into it are seeing it for the bullshit it was. Hope was the platform of a presidential of a major country. God help western civilization.


It is what it is. Maybe you had an ah ha moment of sorts while reading this.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

A tribute to Larry King.


Probably the most annoying interviewer of our time. He was one of the first hideous beings I encountered when we got cable circa 86-87 on CNN. Turner was huge back then.

I'm not a handsome man, but this Larry King is utterly repulsive. His whole demeanor disgusts me and it's a wonder he's lasted this long. You can never underestimate the taste of the American public. He portrays himself as not having a point of view, but he does. We all do, just be f#ckn honest about it. He hunches over with his tight suspenders and round back (which reminds me I need to sit up straight - I've adjusted my car seat these days).

He looks like a fly or a bug. I just wanna slap him. And I'm not a violent person.

This old nagging bastard of a man has been married like a million times. Apparently he can't keep his #### in his pants. Maybe I'm a little jealous but they were only with him 'cause of his money. Indirect prostitution is what it is. Gawd, who would wanna be interviewed by this ratty man, let alone sleep with him and bare his children. Yes, money goes a looooonnnng way.

I don't watch TV anymore really, aside from sports, but it'll be nice to see this old f#ck fade away as he has brought nothing good or positive to the table. Buh bye Larry!

I can't believe I've lowered myself to write a blog about Larry King. Maybe my next one will be on the Golden Girls or Matlock.

Godbless.

A couple Facts/Sidenotes:
His lastname isn't King(obviously)-
What kind of a creep names themself King? Self-esteem issues? It's like putting a false "von" in your last name.

He named one of his kids Chance
Lame name.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Somedays I feel like trying.

Some days I feel like trying. Pulling my act together and really doing something. I think a lot of my ambition is based on caffeine intake or testosterone treatment, maybe even vitamin D (maybe a good BM too). I think to partake in trying or going for it, you first have to find worth in what your going for. As it stands in my own head, finding worth in anything is a tough task. Everything does pass. Even the most accomplished and respected achievers are either rotting bones, or they will be. A good solid relationship will always end too. Those of you in love, please realize that. ;)

What makes others care, especially here? Right now I'm still focused on basic selfish needs. These needs are paying rent and eating and having a warm comfortable bed. Those are huge things for me. Aside from this I'm just striving to be entertained. Playing music is good and beneficial. Maybe that's something I care about. I really don't want to invite anymore complexity/drama in my life.

I think if I was fighting for something, even my own life, I'd be a lot more motivated and positive. I found myself seeing value in things when I was rehabilitating. I wouldn't be surprised, I'm sure it's already been discovered, that people who have less are more positive. (Not that I have a lot)

Our grandparents, while they weren't all that positive, seemed more motivated than I am now. They had a lot less and a lot more to work towards. What should I do? Buy a house and be enslaved to that structure until I die. Would that make me happier? Should I seek out some poor soul to breed with? Would that make me happier?

I don't feel a strong pull towards any of that.

<<Now that I'm reading this I've noticed my last blog (if anyone read) was death related, and this post is dark too - I blame this on the holiday season. This horrible holiday season. I think you're insane if you find joy in this time of year.>>

I kind of wish I was home right now so I can find a good bed to sleep on for 48 hours. Sleeping is a really good thing. Please excuse this if it sounds like the rant of a high school girl. I assure this is how I'm feeling now. Dainty Bones has spoken.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Preserving the Body after Tits Up.


There are a lot of stupid, irrational, wasteful things we do as humans. I do my fair share of them. One thing that immediately comes to mind is preserving the human body after it dies. To add to this, we put a lifeless corpse in an expensive casket. The casket is then put in the earth and we won't ever see it again. Seems like a waste of money and materials.

(((If you're curious about the history cheque this out:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Embalming )))

The body now serves no purpose. The casket company took your money. The loved one that died then gets placed in a cemetary with people he/she didn't even know (aside from maybe family). The tombstone company also gets your money. I should've been a mortician.

Then there is the cremation option. You gotta pay for that.

Whatever happened to just putting somebody in a bag and digging a hole about six feet? Do you really need a funeral director and a mortician for this process? The body should be allowed to rot naturally and benefit the earth. A canvas sack or body bag might cost $20.

http://www.greenburials.org/

I'm aware a cold dead body of a friend or family member might be weird to transport. You could hire someone to move the body so you can set up your own service out in the woods or something free of the sterile creepy funeral directors. You could have a jamboree.

If you've never looked at the price of a funeral, check out this page below. It's quite outrageous. Spending more money on a dead body doesn't mean you loved them more than the other family down the hall.

(((A funeral home in Fargo, outrageous prices, but I'm sure these aren't any different than anywhere else.
http://www.boulgerfuneralhome.com/price_lists/index.php )))

In closing, I hope this blog allowed you to think of other alternatives to the usual costly approach to death. Nothing being said here is outrageous or groundbreaking. This is more of a return to how things used to be before some strange customs and business got a hold of everything.

Enjoy your morbid Monday.

God bless.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Swell slang words that caught my eye.

I was on urbandictionary.com today and thought you might all enjoy these.
 
-Doocumber
A turd (or shit) the size and shape of a cucumber.
I ate lots of stirfry and shat the biggest doocumber ever.

-Stucko
Someone who is always drunk and acting like a idiot.

-stud fucker
a man who won't give a woman sex when she wants it
 
-studderfuck
when you have sex with, a person that studders, or a person has sex with you, and you have a studder.
 
You :" Dude, i totally had sex with that chick who studders!"
OtherGuy: "oh man, you had your first studderfuck!"
 
-student body
A term, usually used in high school, to describe a girl who has sex with a lot of different guys.
 
-strue
An abbreviation of "It's true." A general term of agreement or assent.
 
-one upper
An annoying person who responds to hearing someone else’s experience or problem by immediately telling a similar story about themselves with a much more fantastic (or terrible) outcome.
 
-One Woman Circus
A female who has enough personalities to keep you completely occupied. One minute you're labeled gay and the next minute you're labeled a pathological flirt. One minute she's praising the Lord, the next minute she's getting drunk all over the place. Who is she? You will never know because she is a One Woman Circus or also known as a Jack Of All Characters.
 
-One Wipe Wonder
A crap where you only have to wipe your ass once.
 
-One-and-a-half Date
Not quite a double date, but not exactly a date either. It's when you invite someone out on a date, and they pull a defensive maneuver and bring a friend along, as a date shield.
 
-one-eleven
to wipe your dirty ass with your index, middle and ring fingers in unison. Typically one does this when there is no toilet paper or suitable substitution available.
 
-Is it in yet?
Term used to indicate a small penis size, so small that the woman can not feel it in her vagina.
 
Possibly the worst sentence you can expect to hear from your sexual partner - save from "Surprise! I have AIDS!".
 
everything above is from:

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

A tribute to Tom Dempsey.


I had nightmares about this dude ever since they showed a clip of his record setting winning field goal.

The dude was born with no toes (life's hard) and half an arm (you don't need arms to kick field goals). He was a straight on field goal kicker, as opposed to soccer style. There are no straight on field goal kickers anymore in the NFL.

On November 8, 1970, he kicked a 63-yard field goal (this record was tied in the late 90s) to beat the Lions at the end of the game. Some thought he had an unfair advantage because he had no toes. He probably did.

"In 1977, the NFL added a rule, informally known as the "Tom Dempsey Rule," that "any shoe that is worn by a player with an artificial limb on his kicking leg must have a kicking surface that conforms to that of a normal kicking shoe."[3][4]"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Dempsey

Watch the video on youtube if you don't believe me. (enjoy!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrxTjgFYoU8

Monday, December 6, 2010

My first crush was on white trash with bug bites.

We lived in a neighborhood in a mid-sized American city. We played on the streets and alleys. The alleys provided an ideal venue for intense wiffle ball games, bike riding, and other mischief. Across our alley lived a peculiar family. They had a daughter my age. (I won't name names)

As was in my family, maybe a lot of families, the young ins got teased for showing any sort of love or affection towards anything of the opposite sex. My father took full advantage of that, as well as my older brother and sister. They showed NO mercy. They sang songs and sought to humiliate me for spending time with someone I had secretly considered a girlfriend.

So this girl across the alley was quite a unique being. For one thing she was skinnier than I was (maybe malnourished) and she had bites of some sort all over her body. She had a brother too. They both talked weird. Her father looked like a crazy alcoholic. My mother once asked her father where he was walking too and with this creepy look on his face he smiled and said he was getting a "sip of the vine". I distinctly remember this.

Me being the mature four year old, I was able to see beyond the neglect and maybe even abuse her parents had put them through. I saw her as a human being; an equal. We clicked immediately and I would even eat dinner over there. Her brother had to sit on phonebooks. We'd play games and everything was swell.

Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on your stance, my brother and sister's influence of teasing me and that family won out. This may have been my very first moral dilemma. Do I stick with a good loyal friend/partner, or do I heed the words of my older siblings who were obviously wiser than me? Plus I liked making them laugh.

I chose the less dignified route and began to betray/harass my first girlfriend. (This instance here maybe set in motion a long line destructive decisions I've made)

This eventually ended with her taking a swing at me. Crying soon followed. I think her grandma called me a baby which is the worst insult a five year old could ever get. That made me cry more.

I had it coming to me as I provoked the whole thing. This was justice in its most pure form. I wasn't crying over being physically hurt I was crying because someone I had cared about wanted to hurt me. Maybe part of me was crying because I knew I was to blame for this.

Looking back, I may not have been fully aware that  I was being manipulated by the "powers that be." Of course no one punished my older brother and sister for this. And they weren't there when that bony fist connected with my scrawny gut.

((side note: I'm sure this whole event made my granddad (who was living with us) and my dad proud that their boy got slugged by the most undernourished girl in the hood))

This was the first of many times being slugged by a girl. I expect more are on the way. I've been able to compose myself better since that first initial hit.

Godbless.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

If I had my own personal ad it would read...



SWDM seeking F

Dainty, depressed, nasally, anxiety ridden thirty something male who walks with a limp, dresses nice and has good hair but has questionable health/habits looking for anything 18-57 years old that isn't a male and that isn't overweight (nice breasts preferred a plus). If you are willing to spend time at the fire company, hear me talk about myself, ridicule others, and take redundant verbal abuse and laugh at it, than you're the one for me. You should also have a full supply of earplugs 'cause my snoring (gagging) is out of site. Hope to hear from you soon, god bless, call me at #########!

I don't care for Christmas.

The puritans banned it. I'm not a big advocate of banning anything but maybe this was a good idea.

As a kid I liked it a lot. It was an excuse to ask for things. The whole thing turned me into a greedy little bitch. I went to catholic school and there were some rich kids in the class. I always felt in competition with them for the coolest stuff. Then you would gather with your friends and tell them what you got. If it was a slow Christmas then you felt embarrassed. Thankfully many of my Christmas wishes came through. If not by my parents then my older bro and sis. Looking back I wonder who the hell was I to be that demanding.

This was and is the culture though. It's probably worse now. One of thousands of reasons I will not have kids.

Then there is the music. Most of it gets old fast. It instantly depresses me. It immediately brings regretful feelings.

<<<Christmas mass was always fun to serve as there was lots of incense and pageantry.>>>

Thankfully my family has done away with most of the shit and stress surrounding the holiday. I guess that's natural as heads get older. Nowadays we eat together and get a cabin at a ski resort. It's very laid back. Simple approach.

As much as I don't care for this holiday and the present thingy I will list some memorable gifts that I have received:

1) Authentic Seattle Seahawks Jersey with my last name on the back (1985)
2) Donkey Kong for Atari (early 80's)
3) Fisher Price Tape recorder - which I broke playing Lionel Ritchie's - Can't Slow Down(early 80's)
4) Tabletop hockey game with levers controlling/spinning players (88 I think)
5) Miniature pool table (1989)

Feel free to reply and post memorable gifts.


Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Blogs are Horrible.

Q-Why are blogs horrible?

A-Because in most cases they are written by people who like to talk about themselves and their own experiences. If you were to gather all of the words I've put down in the month or so I've been on here you wouldn't find many meaningful statements. What you would find is me talking about myself. I hope this is entertaining because it's not informative. It must be something because I keep getting hits. Maybe my friends are being nice and catering to my self indulgence.

I don't think this blog sh!+ would've been too popular fifty years ago. Back when people did real things with their lives. Substance mattered a lot more. Before entertainment and media became fluff driven. Fluff is a big thing these days. Blogs are an extension of that. Facebook and Myspace too.

A society of fluff.

For some reason along the way I decided to be, or, maybe I always was self absorbed and this is what I write about. This is nothing to brag about. I should be ashamed. This isn't virtuous behavior. I rant about stuff and a handful of friends and a few others from around the globe (we're now into Germany and Slovenia) read it. And I get off on viewing all my hits.

Thanks for reading my stuffs. I will continue to write meaningless sh!+.

Truth to Power: Thank you Mr. Julian Assange

I like what he is doing. There should be more transparency in government. If we had a couple Julian Assanges in my town we'd be in good shape.

America has been on an imperialistic rampage since about the 1950s or so, even before then. We've done a lot of bad things including Operation Ajax and Operation Gladio. There are many others. Maybe this will level the playing field or at least keep them "honest". Maybe this will make the US a little more cautious. We don't want to hear about our troops killing innocent civilians sometimes or that the casualties in Iraq are over 100,000. We block that stuff out. It should be addressed and talked about more. I'm hoping this information will change naive and trusting perceptions of our government/military/foreign policy.

There was some good stuff on Hillary Clinton ordering US diplomats to spy on UN Leaders. I've always despised Hillary Clinton. She seems like a power hungry sociopath (like most in politics). Evidently, she got fingerprints and credit card numbers on people. Creepy, but not unexpected.

This is a nice role reversal. After the Patriot Act in 2001 and all the surveillance and even now the molestation from government on its slaves (I mean citizens), via the TSA, its quite refreshing to see powers caught with their junk out. Take note of how they're reacting towards this. They want Assange dead. This is how power works and it's killed many in the past who have had secrets or appear as threats.

I've concluded after about twenty years of following politics and just experiencing life that the worst and most vile souls pursue politics and power. There are exceptions to everything. But those who think that they can manage a large diverse country are ego trippin. Thank you Mr. Assange and I hope you survive to put more of this stuff out there. Bless and keep.


Check the links below for meaningful information on all of this.
http://wikileaks.org/
http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,2033771,00.html

other past covert government nonsense, enjoy!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Gladio
http://wearechangecoloradosprings.org/docs.php

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Growing up dainty.

I grew up being a dainty kid. A dainty kid loving sports. That's a delicate balancing act, if you will.

I remember loving football but hating to get tackled, even being afraid sometimes. There were big kids out there. Before all the crap with my leg went down I was pretty decent in the open field. I had moves. Moves that would sometimes work. I could also throw the ball pretty good and accurate with a tight spiral. I just didn't like getting tackled or tackling anyone. Eventually we all switched over to tag football and found a nice big church parking lot to play in. I did my damage there. I'm sure I set passing records.

In baseball I never wanted to get hit with the ball. It was my biggest phobia. Watching the faster pitchers warm up would make me nervous. It took me about 6 at bats in two games to get used to this. I think I had a tendency to step into the pitches late and also step away. Most of the time I hit em in the opposite field (left field, cause I'm a lefty(meaning more intelligent/creative)). I was a pitcher too. I was pretty good for being dainty. Won the team MVP that year. My average ended up being like .600.

Basketball was another game I enjoyed. Basketball is physical too. Maybe more physical than what people think or assume. I loved shooting from outside and maybe doing an uncontested lay up but I never cared for boxing out or grabbing rebounds. That's how people get hurt. Playing pick up games I'd fear the oafish uncoordinated kids. I saw them as serious hazards. I was timid. But I had a good shot.

Fighting provided great entertainment for me but I would never participate. The only person I ever got violent with was my younger brother but that was when he was much smaller than me. I still like antagonizing people but I will never get in a physical fight. I think that would be embarrassing for all parties involved.

Dainty is no easy road to walk. It must be done with dignity and pride and maybe the slightest hint of masculinity, if possible. God bless.

Monday, November 29, 2010

The Time Portal

He's entered the time portal a few times. The time portal is both warm and fuzzy, not to mention foggy. To the brave soul who has entered the portal everything seems fine. To others, he appears to be slurring his speech and drooling on 'eemself. A jar of peanut butter is one of the few things that can be taken into the time portal.

Eventually you get sleepy.

He was in the portal last Saturday and to those around 'eem he had a shi++y look on his face and a blank stare.

He goes into the portal because life's hard. There are other dimensions to try out. He needs to unwind.

I've seen souls drop full cans of Chesterfield's on the living room floor as if it were nothing. Then they laugh it off. They become like little golf balls rolling through rooms and curving towards the doorways as if the house has little slopes like a putting green. It's both a beautiful and tragic sight. It's always followed by a serious tits up.

Steve Winwood sings of Higher Love.

***For more on Time Travel, check out: http://www.johntitor.com/


Physical or emotional pain: which one is worse?

If you're human you've dealt with both. I've dealt with some. Some of have dealt with it way more than I can imagine. If you had to choose one over the other which one would it be?

Both impact each other. Emotional pain can come from physical pain, and physical from emotional pain.

Physical pain is a broad topic. There is bone pain that can come from breaks/fractures, bone infections and arthritis. Bone breaks are bad but the one I had was more achy than anything. Pain from a bone infection can be quite severe. Mine feels more like a constant kicking in the shin if I stop taking my meds. I've never dealt with arthritis but that can get crazy as all get out.

Muscles can be a good source for physical pain. Cramps are pretty severe and sharp. I tend to get a little nervous if I feel one coming on. Pulled muscles and tares can be pretty annoying. I don't believe I ever tore a muscle.

Then there are migraines, toothaches, intestinal pains, and incisions. All of these can be horrendous. All of these can have serious impact on your life and mood.

Then there is emotional pain.

The two big ones are probably losing a loved one and breaking up with someone. These are very common. Remember how you felt? Would you choose that over arthritis?

Emotional pain, panic attacks, terror, and depression can also come from anxiety and mental disorders. You may feel insecure about something or believe people are after you. Depending on your psychological state you may be able to control this and even snap out of it. Others have no control. Regardless, these are some types of emotional pain. Anything here seem appealing?

It's really a tough question but I think I'm leaning towards the emotional. You can still be physically healthy and have emotional pain. Whereas most physical pain comes from something going wrong in your body. Most physical pain, I believe, leads to some kind of emotional pain, maybe more than the other way around. While physical pain does seem to be debilitating, I've found a lot of past emotional pain has made me stronger and improve my lifestyle decisions and get busy with something. I've found severe physical pain a much greater barrier and a serious threat to my sleeping patterns and a functioning life.

Which one would you prefer?

Please add to my blog if you feel that I left out something from either topic as I'm sure I have.

related article on pain : http://serendip.brynmawr.edu/exchange/node/1850

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Ten cheesy "pop" political books




Just some titles I've come across in the past years. We see a lot of these towards election time in the bookstore. These kind of caught my eye. Most likely cause of title and cover. I'm not sure who buys these books. They make me smile. Just silly.




10)
John McCain - A Man of Straight Talk
I love the nicknames they give themselves.

9) Living History - Hillary Clinton
She makes me vomit.

8) Conservative Victory: Defeating Obama's Radical Agenda by Sean Hannity 
His radio show is horrible. He is horrible. 

7) Liberty and Tyranny: A Conservative Manifesto by Mark R. Levin 
This guys voice is even more annoying than my own.

6) Arguing with Idiots: How to Stop Small Minds and Big Government by Glenn Beck and Kevin Balfe
Yes big gov'ment is no good...but Glenn Beck is a thesbian.

5) Truth and Consequences: Special Comments on the Bush Administration's War on American Values by Keith Olbermann
olbermann had credibility under bush but keeps silent under obama....

4) Culture Warrior by Bill O'Reilly
Funny coming from someone who sexually harasses his employees then pays them off...great cover too...

3) Know Your Power: A Message to America's Daughters by Nancy Pelosi and Amy Hill Hearth 
---------------

2) Dreams from My Father: A Story of Race and Inheritance by Barack Obama
I'm moved.

1) The Audacity of Hope: Thoughts on Reclaiming the American Dream (Vintage) by Barack Obama 
Are people still buying this?

About a month into it: Who views dainty bones?

Those of you who read this $h!+, thank you very much!

We've been at it a month and we think it's going okay. One of my favorite parts of blogging is the stats section that blogger.com has set up. It keeps track of where you're getting the hits from and what time of day people are viewing. I find myself checking it religiously.

We're pretty close to having 1000 hits. I realize some of them are my own. I also understand I tend to put a lot of blogs up there. I write here instead of Facebook. I might bring some blogs in from my Facebook.

My Virgin Blog, and Hugs are Frivalous have received the most hits.

Below is a list of where I have received the hits from, if anyone cares:


United States

Canada

Singapore

United Kingdom

Netherlands

Australia

Belgium

Iraq

South Korea

Romania








Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Thanksgiving/Thankfulness.

What am I thankful for? Here's an extensive list, not necessarily in order of importance.



  1. Food
  2. Sleep
  3. Shelter
  4. Fire Company
  5. Kutztown heads
  6. Mom and Dad
  7. "Treats"
  8. Writing and playing music with the best peeps on earth
  9. Women's pants (on me)
  10. My nice bum
  11. That I can walk
  12. That a place like Amsterdam exists
  13. That I have a job that's cool
  14. My Mazda 3 (tiptronic)
  15. Goodwill
  16. Shoes
  17. Pharmacies
  18. Ron Paul
  19. Wham!
  20. Looping pedals and sound effects
  21. Bass Lines and Rhythms
  22. Raunchy guitar noises
  23. Gluten
  24. Paul Lynch's pesto pizza
  25. Habaneros
  26. A good bed
  27. Canola oil
  28. Protection
  29. Beef Smoked Sausage on the grille
  30. Relaxing

Monday, November 22, 2010

Atari Shorts and Compression Stockings: All at the buffet




I was indecisive about dinner tonight. I ended up at a buffet on the Fifth St. Highway outside of inner-city Reading, PA. The place was empty.....for the most part.

I was drawn in by the Mongolian BBQ sign. When I got up to the booth for the beef and other meats it almost turned my stomach. Nothing looked like anything I wanted to put in my body (that sacred temple of mine). I got the green beans and chicken stuffs from the buffet.

A typical fat Pennsylvania Dutchman(I assume - I assume because lots of them are way overweight and have diabetes) on a little motorized scooter/wheelchair vehicle was going around. He had Atari shorts. These were designed with the Atari logo in different colors all over the shorts. Beautiful. For socks he was wearing knee high navy blue (school girl looking) compression stockings. His shirt is not worth mentioning. An ironic hipster would've envied his approach as he was also sporting a mustache.

The man would just drive around the buffet, lean over and take things back to his table with a child like grin. It was sort of disgusting to watch. I got the feeling he was in his own heaven. Not unlike how I felt when I was in Amsterdam. When he left I took note that he left a couple uneaten pieces of banana cream pie. He also liked clams and surprisingly sushi.

How was this fat ass going to lose any weight hanging out a buffet? Maybe he needed a food intervention. I understand people come in all sizes but this was out of hand. I began to look inward before thinking any more negative thoughts and feelings towards this dude.


Internal Questions that came to mind:

1) Am I not that much better than this pig as I drink and alcohol isn't good for bones? Am I not continuing in unhealthy behavior as he is?
2) Will I end up like this pig for thinking and then writing a horrible blog about him and in doing so placing myself above him?
3) Was he like me at one point and just decided to give up? Will I decide to give up? Have I already decided to give up? Or am I living how I want to?
4) What does this fat fellow do for fun other than eat?
5) Is he diabetic?
6) Who the fuck decided to put that little boy outfit on this grown fat man with salt n pepper hair?
7) What's his favorite Atari game? Outlaw, Combat, Pac-Man, Pitfall?

Other things came to mind but these were the most prominent thoughts. Hours have past and in reflecting on this blog I decided to look to the heavens and say a prayer for the both of us. I've realized we're brothers and my original thinking is strictly my ego. Life is weird and things get flipped around. It wasn't long ago I needed people to empty my piss buckets and bring me food. It all could happen again.

Imagine, a whole blog being inspired by a chubby man with fat legs and Atari shorts. I'm a better man for having gone to this ungodly buffet.

Forgive our vain attitudes.

Help us all to be humble servants of truth and wisdom and love.

Amen.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

My fear of AVN.

It's been a while since I wrote a blog. As I was struggling with ideas I came up with this one which indirectly relates to the title of my blog page - Dainty Bones. I was pretty obsessed with this condition after my hip injury. One of the first things I was told (in between morphine hits) was that I could qualify for this disease. It's called Avascular Necrosis. This is what it is:
 
Osteonecrosis is bone death caused by poor blood supply to the area. It is most common in the hip and shoulder.

Avascular necrosis; Osteonecrosis; Ischemic bone necrosis; AVN; Aseptic necrosis

Osteonecrosis occurs when part of the bone does not get blood and dies. After a while the bone can break off. If this condition is not treated, bone damage gets worse. Eventually, the affected part of the bone may collapse

https://health.google.com/health/ref/Osteonecrosis"

The doctor's assistant came in and drew me a little diagram on a sheet of paper. It's not a hard condition to understand. What I don't like about this is you don't know if you are out of the woods, or, safe from getting it until about 2 years after the injury. My two year mark will coming soon, in May of 2011. Thankfully I'm not feeling a lot of pain, but I am feeling something. This could be because of the cold whether - compression screws. Another positive is that my doctor, who did a swell job on my hip BTW (I'm close to the same flexibility), said I have a 75% chance of being alright.

But what if I'm not?

I get my hip replaced. That's a pretty serious deal. I read Bo Jackson (in his 30s), Prince and Eddie Van Halen had it done. My co-worker had it done. He's in his 60's. He's up and around and feeling great.

The thing that is scary is that they get rid of much of your upper femur and pound a fake artificial joint in there in the bone. That requires a big incision and blood thinner medication to stop clots (rat poison!). The recovery time is remarkably short though. I was laid up and in pain for almost 2 months. My co-worker said he was putting weight on it in 3 weeks.

Hopefully this won't be an issue but I'll probably blog about it if it is.








 

Thursday, November 11, 2010

My masculinity is defined by what millionaires do on the field.

There was a time in my life when I was a serious football fan. I would follow everything, even the pre-game shows, days before the game. I would watch all of the interviews. It took me a while to realize that athletes say the same things in every interview, despite what team they are on, or what the standings are. They are trained to give all the right answers to the media.

"We're just focusing on this weeks game."
"They're a fine team."
"They're defense is really impressive on film."

If my team lost my whole week was ruined. It put a really big damper on things. Things could be okay but then I'd recall Sunday's game and be saddened. This is not healthy.

Eventually you grow up and deal with your own problems and work at your own life. If not, you remain trapped in the mental illness and vicarious living through your sports team. Luckily, other stuff came along and I grew up. I still watch the game on Sunday but that's it. Three hours a week is okay. If that.

There is a bigger problem though. While most of us grow up and move on to other things, a large amount of people, men, are still worshipping their sports teams and players. We know more about the stats of players than what's going on in government. Instead of getting upset with the raping and pillaging of the treasury, we get ticked off at a bad call in a game.

Alex Jones (whatever you may think of him) thinks pro sports and entertainment in general is a conspiracy. A conspiracy to get our attention off of the abuses of government. Whether it is or not remains to be seen. If it is though, it's working pretty well. If the energy and knowledge about athletes and teams was spent researching the evidence given for the Iraq war would it have happened so easily? Would the bailouts have gone through. Would Obama-care have gone through? Would we have the same pathetic luke warm, puppet candidates we always have running for office, or would we get someone in who was for real change and individual liberty?

These things remain to be seen.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Hugs are Frivalous.

I'm coming clean on hugs. I think they're frivalous. The only time hugs are relevant are in "intimate" scenerios, or when one is drunk. Sometimes the 2 are combined.

I'm tired of getting weird looks if I decide to shake a girl's hand. I'm cold. I come from the cold Germanic von Stiehl line. I think most of the time girls impose hugs on guys. But then they leave and don't want anything else. If a guy really likes their hug than he is a dirty man(sometimes this is true - see below). I don't understand it.

I love my parents as any other person loves their own but I feel no need to hug them. What is the point? We know the deal. That is that.

When are hugs necessary?
1) After a jolly night of drinkin with the fellows
2) As a prelude to a physical encounter
3) Or just being polite to someone who is dependent on hugs (after all, you don't wanna appear cold)

Do I ever like hugging?
Yes, but, it has to be the right woman. And I prefer to be naked. This usually occurs as often as the cicadas come around.

Men who hug a lot.
Most men who hug a lot, in my experience are creeps who just like to feel a woman's body against them (nothin wrong with that, but they get all horned up). Many of them talk warmly as if they care, but it is all a game to get some ass. And, of course they are perceived by most as warm and compasionate, whereas people like me who speak truth to power come across as cold. Yeah, I'm a victim. Life's hard.

This is it on hugs. Enjoy. God bless.


The importance of having a good hair day.

I showered and shampooed last night before bed. When I sleep with a wet head and wake up the next morning it's always a question as to whether I'm going to have a good hair day. It sometimes keeps me up at night.

Well, I did and I am. (having a good hair day)

My hair is at a good length these days. It's a nice brownish color. I really like whats going on with it. At this length it's always essential that I keep it washed. When it's greasy, and if I haven't shaved I look like a drunk (which of course I'm not). Washing it a couple times over gives it great body, though I lose control.

<<In the past with shorter hair styles and shorter bangs especially, I kind of like to keep it mildly greasy so I can gain some control. You see, as nice as my hair is, it's only downfall is that it's extremely thin and tough to control.>>

Now, I need the flow and the body. Washing it gives me that. Picture hockey legend Guy LaFleur skating down the ice with no helmet and his hair flowing back. That's what I'm about these days.

So what does all this mean?

It means it's vitally important to have a good hair day. It gives you confidence on the job and when running serious game at the local establishment. When we have good hair we can hold our heads high. I wasn't blessed with the prettiest face, maybe my ears are slightly too big, maybe my jawline could be stronger and more chiseled, but hair is something I, we can control. It's up to us to decide what type of hair goes with what type of skull.

Truth be told I don't spend hours on my hair. It happens. But, we must be willing to recognize when a hair style approach doesn't work. It's a feeling thing, vibes and whatnot. Evaluate your hair and decide whether your approach is working.

Don't f#$@ around with your hair!

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Mallwalking, Michal, and me. (Soft hands get softer)

I'm short on cash this week. I mean, I have enough just to live off of 'til payday. Instead of gallivanting somewhere in my window of time I headed over to mall to look at shoes and mediocre products and clothing.

The mall has a very limited selection of shoes. I checked a few department stores and shoe stores and it's pretty sad. I like looking at shoes and produc's. Sears had some really nice colored green and sky blue docker pants for 10$. If they are there on Friday I'll get 'eem.

(I'm still in awe that department stores are still in business and wonder who shops there.)

Walking through the main section of the Mall towards the other end was a kiosk for dead sea salts. Three years ago I was suckered in there. These ladies are quite aggressive as well as flirty-not to mention hawt. The last time I went I ended up getting stuff. Stuff I ended up using and liking a lot. I never get that stuff. I can't complain. I'm sure it's over priced though. Tweet ripped on me for getting it and being conned, but ended up using it..maybe more than I did. MOTHER!

Michal (Mik hal) came up to me this time. A different girl, but grinning brightly. I guess I fit the appearance for a sucker, or married, most likely sucker (they're not necessarily mutually exclusive). This time I knew what I was dealing with. I knew I had little money. So, I decided to just enjoy the treatment on my soft delicate hands.

She approached me and asked if I was married. I said NEVER. She lured me over to her stand and started talking about the Dead Sea and why it's called the Dead Sea (nothing can survive in it-makes sense). I put the stuff on my hands and began to rub them together. It felt nice and now my hands smell nice.

She asked if I'd ever used lotion before. I smiled and said, "only in special occasions."

She chose to ignore that and continue on. I was trying to throw her off but she stuck to her points. She had a strong Israeli accent too.

When it came time for the sale I had to disappoint her and tell her I had limited cash flow. I politely offered to take her to the ATM so she could read my balance for the week. She seemed sad. I was happy to enjoy the moment and free treatment. Life's short. Live it up.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Stiehl's Choice: Top 10 Yacht Rock songs

Here they are, don't send me hate mail over this. I know yacht rock fans are an easy going yet passionate bunch. This was inspired by a party we threw at the house back in September. It got rowdy. Yacht Rock was the theme and Yacht Rock came thru that night.....enjoy, please comment with your list.

10) I'm All Right - Kenny LogginsJust an uplifting. Kenny speaks truth to power in this song. We've all felt all right, at one point, only to have people worrying about us. Kenny rises above it all. This was rightfully chosen for Cadyshack. Thanks Loggins.

9) Swept Away - Christopher Cross
Haven't we all been swept away at one time or another? Christopher puts that feeling into song. A song we can all connect with.

8) Shine Sweet Freedom - Michael McDonald
Written in the 80's. A time to celebrate freedom. Used for a movie starring Billy Crystal. The video is a must see. Especially the end, when they're all having beers together, McDonald, Crystal and the other star of that flick.

7) Baby Please Don't Go - Chicago
Peter Cetera's angelic voice begging his love to please don't go makes it at #7. How could any woman (or man) leave Peter Cetera with vocals like that (and hair too).

6) Baker Street - Gerry Rafferty
This song builds nicely. One of the few yacht rock songs that is hard to mock. Nice use of saxophone in the chorus. Well constructed song.

5) Higher Love - Steve Winwood
"Think about it, there must be higher love." A proposition set forth by the ex-band member of Traffic. He's asking you to think about. This song has like 4 bridges and the most fake sounding trumpets ever. The beats sound nice in my car. I'd be lying if I said this song doesn't fire me up.

4) Next Time I Fall in Love - Peter Cetera ft. Amy GrantGood concept. Incredible control of vocals. Amy Grant teams up with the Chicago's ex-frontman for a moving duet.

3) All Right - Christopher CrossCross, singing to a lover, tells her it's gonna be all right in this soft yet upbeat ditty. You can almost move to it. Legend Michael McDonald joins in on the chorus. This one puts a shitty smirk on my face.

2) Sailing - Christopher Cross
Yes, "the canvas can do miracles." Chris paints a scenic and joyous picture of his warm childhood memories of sailing. This song is like water. It just flows. Nice simple piano solo after the second verse and chorus.

1) I Keep Forgettin' - Michael McDonald
Maybe one of my favorite bass lines in any song ever. Yes, and I'm being serious. It was so good it was used in the rap song "Regulate" 15 years after McDonald put it out there. I shake it every time it comes on. Turns out its fun song to dance to drunk with your shirt off at a party. Just a great groove over Michael's smooth voice.


Saturday, November 6, 2010

Weis Markets(2010)/Giant Eagle(1994): After Hours.

I slept most of the day after your work, yesterday. Work ended at 10AM so I got a lot of sleep. Had a brief stint at the Fire Company in the late afternoon, then came back home for more rest. I had bigger plans, but energy and morale was lacking.

I woke up at 10pm and decided I needed some good nourishment. I went to Weis. I was gonna do other things but money is tight til Friday. Weis plays pretty good music for being a supermarket.

Weis had few customers, but many were there stocking the shelves. This was around 11pm. I'm not sure what it is but I always get a peaceful/happy feeling pushing the cart around. Being surrounded by food gives me joy. I consider the possibilities.

Watching the workers stock the shelves reminded me of my summer in 1994 when I did the night shift at Giant Eagle, down the street from my house in Pittsburgh. There were some characters I worked with...


Walt Bigballs
Old Walt lived across the alley. He must of been in his 50's. He used to sunbathe in the little backyard of his apartment in his underwear. We used to mock him (not to his face), me, my dad and my brother. He spoke like a dumb pollock. Occasionally he'd make weird noises while stocking shelves. Sometimes he'd sing. I think he had mental issues. I think he's still alive. I remember it was birthday once and a co-worker asked him what he did. I think he said he went down to Liberty Ave. This was a street notorious for street hookers and peep show booths.


Ziggy
This dude was another character. Another pollock with a limited education. He was a funny and we used to joke around. Occasionally we'd bust on Walt. We were supposed to go to a Pitt game but that never happened. He had a beard and missing teeth. I think both Ziggy and Walt liked to drink a lot.


Jeff
Jeff was the guy who trained who trained me. He was a big black dude. He knew how to run shit and was very nice as a manager. He and the other 2 guys mentioned of course saw me as this extremely naive kid. I was 18 years old, but skinny and looked about 14 years old.

There were other characters there too. I don't remember their names. One short fat dude would walk around and if he saw you, he'd compulsively ask, "you havin fun yet!?" I guess not unlike how I throw out repetitive phrases and questions. There was a very flamboyant dude with a shaved head and mustache. He worked in dairy a lot. He would speak of his boyfriend sporadically. Then there was big breasted black chick who I would think about quite often at that age. Some used to make jokes about if we ran out of milk in the dairy department we wouldn't have a problem.

Generally everyone got a long. It was a weird shift. Involving interesting, quirky and maybe some fV<ked up people. I felt like I owned the place walkin' around there.  I remember they cranked a lot of Elton John and Phil Collins over the radio. Sometimes I would treat myself to pepperoni in the deli on lunch breaks. I ate a lot of shitty food on lunch breaks. I always felt physically warn out after work.
This was my first real job. (No, I didn't tare up the paycheck!)
I'm surprised I remember all of this.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

West Reading Fade-away

I had another window of time from 6pm to 8pm so I went back into West Reading.
Stopped in at Viva. Lots of good looking people around, including the bartenders and waitresses that were serving me and the two cougars that were sitting a few seats down from me. People there either have money or they pretend to. Most of my outfit was purchased at Goodwill. I was still the best dressed soul in that place though I was having a mediocre hair day (DAMN!).
In the bar, behind the bar I was sitting at (yes, there are 2 bars in this place, maybe more) was a one man acoustic act covering popular favorites. I think he played Losing my Religion. He sung on key and was flawless. He also had the unique skill of making every fv<k!n song sound the same, lifeless and boring. To his credit he was handsome, and a few young Reading professional chicks stuck around to hear 'em. I assume that's good culture for them. If I was in his shoes I would've parted the Red Sea, so to speak. I mean, they would've left. I shouldn't really criticize any one's performing as I tend to make a drunken spectacle of myself and I have narrow shoulders.
I got a burger and Hoegaarden. The burger was okay. The best burger I ever had was in Shadyside (Pittsburgh) at the Elbow Room, on Ellsworth Avenue (1988). Nothing I've had since then compares. At least they made it rare. The bartender who served me reminded me of a dutchie version of John Stamos (from Full House). Meaning he was good eye candy if I was a homosexual or a girl. He was eye candy none-the-less.
On the television screen they had ESPN on and I found out the old manager of the Big Red Machine (1970's era Cincinnati Reds) Sparky Anderson died today. He was born in 1934. Only four years older than my dad. That made me realize the old folks won't be around forever. That's a sad thought, but it's life. I'm happy my parents take better care of themselves than I do. Maybe they'll out live me.
There really isn't anything deep or thoughtful you're left with when you leave West Reading. On a bright side I found a spot with good looking yuppie snapper, but those types want nothing to do with me. Most types actually. I want little to with them, maybe five minutes worth. I have a bad attitude towards a lot of things.
I pulled out of the parking lot in the Mazda3 listening to a little Al Stewart, wondering if this was indeed, The Year of the Cat.

(I love sappy endings to blogs-(this was done intentionally))

(Viva's food is over priced for what you get, you're also paying for atmosphere too)