Monday, November 22, 2010
Atari Shorts and Compression Stockings: All at the buffet
I was indecisive about dinner tonight. I ended up at a buffet on the Fifth St. Highway outside of inner-city Reading, PA. The place was empty.....for the most part.
I was drawn in by the Mongolian BBQ sign. When I got up to the booth for the beef and other meats it almost turned my stomach. Nothing looked like anything I wanted to put in my body (that sacred temple of mine). I got the green beans and chicken stuffs from the buffet.
A typical fat Pennsylvania Dutchman(I assume - I assume because lots of them are way overweight and have diabetes) on a little motorized scooter/wheelchair vehicle was going around. He had Atari shorts. These were designed with the Atari logo in different colors all over the shorts. Beautiful. For socks he was wearing knee high navy blue (school girl looking) compression stockings. His shirt is not worth mentioning. An ironic hipster would've envied his approach as he was also sporting a mustache.
The man would just drive around the buffet, lean over and take things back to his table with a child like grin. It was sort of disgusting to watch. I got the feeling he was in his own heaven. Not unlike how I felt when I was in Amsterdam. When he left I took note that he left a couple uneaten pieces of banana cream pie. He also liked clams and surprisingly sushi.
How was this fat ass going to lose any weight hanging out a buffet? Maybe he needed a food intervention. I understand people come in all sizes but this was out of hand. I began to look inward before thinking any more negative thoughts and feelings towards this dude.
Internal Questions that came to mind:
1) Am I not that much better than this pig as I drink and alcohol isn't good for bones? Am I not continuing in unhealthy behavior as he is?
2) Will I end up like this pig for thinking and then writing a horrible blog about him and in doing so placing myself above him?
3) Was he like me at one point and just decided to give up? Will I decide to give up? Have I already decided to give up? Or am I living how I want to?
4) What does this fat fellow do for fun other than eat?
5) Is he diabetic?
6) Who the fuck decided to put that little boy outfit on this grown fat man with salt n pepper hair?
7) What's his favorite Atari game? Outlaw, Combat, Pac-Man, Pitfall?
Other things came to mind but these were the most prominent thoughts. Hours have past and in reflecting on this blog I decided to look to the heavens and say a prayer for the both of us. I've realized we're brothers and my original thinking is strictly my ego. Life is weird and things get flipped around. It wasn't long ago I needed people to empty my piss buckets and bring me food. It all could happen again.
Imagine, a whole blog being inspired by a chubby man with fat legs and Atari shorts. I'm a better man for having gone to this ungodly buffet.
Forgive our vain attitudes.
Help us all to be humble servants of truth and wisdom and love.
Posted by Steelpotluck at 5:48 PM