Monday, November 19, 2012

Friday Afternoon ~ IPhones.Twinkies.Tits Up.

Got a late start to my Friday as usual (Hit it hard the night before). This would be a day to run errands. Started and ended at Radio Shack and scored an excellent cheap cell phone (and plan), since my Sprint plan is done, and I found the IPhone to be a complete waste of money for my lifestyle. From Radio Shack, I went to AT&T to cancel my IPhone plan, and that was quick and painless, really no questions asked. From there I crossed the street and ran into some heads at Wegman's but we'll get to that later.

First and foremost though, not to shit on anything, but the IPhone is completely overrated. My Sprint plan ran out and switched to AT&T because they could give me an IPhone for one dollar while locking me into a ridiculous plan. After tax and fees it came to $107 and some change.

What are you getting:

-A Map
What self respecting American male uses a map or GPS in the first place? WTF.
(sidenote: there are no self respecting American males anymore we've all been feminized and trained to suck off of the government's tit, and anyone actually trying to accomplish anything is seen as either greedy or aggressive...)
-Photo Filters
I get all that on Photoshop, I don't need to snap pictures every fucking second. WTF. Not everything is a goddamn moment.
Fuck the games using the Touchscreen, if you really need games to kill time with a gadget than you're an idiot, learn how to converse with people and enjoy your environs.
So what, I can probably check that on the cheap piece of shit phone if I upped the plan by $10/month
I have an IPod, I have a 1961 Victrola Tube Record Player, and I have a doesn't need to be on my phone.
-Facebook anytime!
The Facebook experience is drastically diminished on the IPhone, for optimal FB usage you need a padded deskchair, and a full size screen - with a jug of green jasmine tea and stuffed grape leaves at your side.
Aside from that, I hated the way the thing felt. I wanted to love this thing a lot, really, I did, and I love Mac computers, but this thing didn't do anything for me, in relation to the monthly payments. I was not blown away in the least. To AT&T's credit they give you 14 days to opt out of the plan, it took five hours to realize what I needed to do. The Radio Shack people hooked me up with Virgin LoPay and now I pay $30/month. And that's how I spent part of my Friday afternoon.
I quickly transitioned into one of my favorite Friday rituals, given it's a payday Friday, and staggered through the aisles of Wegmans looking and feeling like a warn out jackass. Two gentlemen from the Allentown Morning Call stopped me near the international foods section to ask me what I thought of Twinkies/Hostess going under. I was still pulling it together at this point and was caught off guard so I really didn't have any pearls of wisdom or deep memories of Twinkies. I mostly mumbled that I wasn't losing any sleep over this, and that it was business. They snapped about five photos which I'm sure are absolutely asinine. Since then I haven't seen anything on their site, and I don't know if I got into the paper. I'm not losing any sleep over this.
I was in the parking lot, loading my car, when a middle aged gentleman started complaining about how crowded Wegman's was, and I asked him if he ran into the Morning Call people. That provided a smooth change of topic into the Twinkie downfall. He went off on the unions, the election, and the country. He was unemployed, and told me I'd probably have to work until I was seventy because entitlements are going bankrupt (I didn't disagree on that). Like most Americans, he wasn't happy with the government, but unlike me, the direction of his anger was only focused on a small part of the problem, Barack Obama, of course. I feel sorry for those who don't quite have all the answers and political knowledge that I do. You know, those who stick to the same beliefs on which they were raised on, without honestly evaluated both sides. Lacking in principles, morality and logic. I'm so glad I'm not like that. I was polite, and tried to find agreement, instead of disagreement.
On my drive home, I had one more stop, a return trip to Radio Shack to activate my account. I like handling these things in person. That's an ole school approach. Things got activated and I was so delighted with my shit phone and fiscal responsibility for once. I ended up making myself a homemade pesto pizza and rested well, before the wild n crazy Lehigh Valley nightlife was to snatch me up again.

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