My fear of AVN (confirmed)

A few months ago I wrote this...

My fear of AVN.

It's been a while since I wrote a blog. As I was struggling with ideas I came up with this one which indirectly relates to the title of my blog page - Dainty Bones. I was pretty obsessed with this condition after my hip injury. One of the first things I was told (in between morphine hits) was that I could qualify for this disease. It's called Avascular Necrosis. This is what it is:

 

"Overview

Osteonecrosis is bone death caused by poor blood supply to the area. It is most common in the hip and shoulder.

Alternative Names

Avascular necrosis; Osteonecrosis; Ischemic bone necrosis; AVN; Aseptic necrosis

Causes

Osteonecrosis occurs when part of the bone does not get blood and dies. After a while the bone can break off. If this condition is not treated, bone damage gets worse. Eventually, the affected part of the bone may collapse

https://health.google.com/health/ref/Osteonecrosis"

The doctor's assistant came in and drew me a little diagram on a sheet of paper. It's not a hard condition to understand. What I don't like about this is you don't know if you are out of the woods, or, safe from getting it until about 2 years after the injury. My two year mark will coming soon, in May of 2011. Thankfully I'm not feeling a lot of pain, but I am feeling something. This could be because of the cold whether - compression screws. Another positive is that my doctor, who did a swell job on my hip BTW (I'm close to the same flexibility), said I have a 75% chance of being alright.

But what if I'm not?

I get my hip replaced. That's a pretty serious deal. I read Bo Jackson (in his 30s), Prince and Eddie Van Halen had it done. My co-worker had it done. He's in his 60's. He's up and around and feeling great.

The thing that is scary is that they get rid of much of your upper femur and pound a fake artificial joint in there in the bone. That requires a big incision and blood thinner medication to stop clots (rat poison!). The recovery time is remarkably short though. I was laid up and in pain for almost 2 months. My co-worker said he was putting weight on it in 3 weeks.

Hopefully this won't be an issue but I'll probably blog about it if it is.

 

------------

 

Well, here's an update:

 

First of, as a self-absorbed drama queen I feel it's quite necessary to tell you how my doctor's appointment went. I had one on Friday.

 

The good news.

I'm not in any great pain. Also, that thing between my thighs showed up really nice and fatty, bigger than the one hanging up in the kitchen. That felt good to see. And I was at least able to hang my head high as a man. A woman later that night told me I was "strong", but that's for a different blog somewhere down the road.

 

The bad news.

Turns out some minor flattening was occurring in the hip ball. Ever so small, yet ever so ominous. This of course means that I have AVN. I join some good company with some great alcoholics, though I'm not one myself (I've been blessed with a delicate stomach, but also cursed w/delicate bones, and my hip break is what caused it.). Eddie Van Halen, Prince, and Bo Jackson all have this. I'm not sure if Prince went through the replacement yet or not. He needs both replaced but he is a Jehovah's Witness and that's against his religion (blood transfusions).

 

(Read above if you want to know about AVN). This kind of ruined my day as I felt things were coming together nicely.

 

Another weird thing is that the screw that held my femoral neck together is close to poking out through the ball. When more, expected flattening occurs, it will come through. I asked the doctor about how that would feel. He gave me a smile, I think he wanted to laugh (why is excruciating pain so funny to doctors?), and said, "you'll know when this happens."

 

This means, in the near future those "pins" or screws will have to be removed hollowing out my femoral neck where they once were. This means about 6 weeks walking on crutches so it doesn't break again and until the bone grows back. I hope they don't put me on rat poison, I don't think they will.

 

All of this means I will most likely need a full replacement at my tender young age of thirty something. They may send me to a specialist to see if there are any alternatives. Hip resurfacing seemed like a nice option but my bone density will most likely not allow for it.

 

On the bright side, I will probably feel a lot pretty good after this whole bullshit is over with. I have gotten used to this nagging pain which is actually quite tolerable. I'm just not looking forward to getting cut open yet again. Morphine through the veins is always pleasant though.

 

 

The Book Announcement.

DaintyBones has announced it will be creating a book, expect something out there in 3 to 5 months....unless i forget or something.

it will include hand-drawn illustrations and maybe some personal photos as well.

apparently it's quite easy on Blurb.com.

i have no business doing this, but....

a close friend of mine is putting a book out so naturally i feel i need to compete with her.....i have a couple solid folks nearby who will do well at editing. or, maybe i'll just do it all myself.

love,
DB.

When Poof came to Fart!

We were in our run down trailer just east of Pittsburgh, (Old) Exit 7 off the PA Turnpike. Most of the time we lived in Shadyside in Pittsburgh but our crazy old man decided he'd try farming out for awhile, having absolutely no experience. I remember the pathetic beagle and it's dog house under the tree and that weird thing that often happened to his thing upon arousal. This was in the late 70's or early 80's. It was either a rainy day or overcast. I must have been four or five. I hated that farm as it made me do one thing I really hated back then. Work.

The family was in the wood paneled "living room" of the trailer. There was a spinning chair and beat up old couch. It had a weird smell. My father was laying down on the couch as he always did. I think he genuinely found amusement in his children, but often it just seemed like he was bustin' our balls. He'd laugh, with all that power he had. I know this sounds bad but I'm writing this with a wide (shitty) grin on my face (like the one our other dog would have if we caught her eating her own stool). My older bro and sis followed my father's lead on the busting balls part.

I was the new one. I was quite a romantic and driven child back then.

I remember coming out of the bathroom after making a deposit. My father as usual made a loud noise. He'd usually force those things out, and laugh like a child, even into his 40's. As a child of four or five, I must have said something like, "who poofed?" or "you poofed."

I was innocent and well meaning then. I still am.

My dad began laughing in that wise ass way he always did. Looking at his high school picture he had a slight Eddie Haskel vibe about him. I suspect he was more of a "prick"(again, I say this lovingly) back then but he never lost those qualities. And with his laughing my older bro and sis joined in.

They were all conspiring against me it seemed. There was an inside joke that I was about to be let in on. And then I heard it!

He said, "I farted."

They continued to laugh.

I was confused.

This was a new powerful word to me. It was like they revealed f###, or c###, or p####, or sh!t.

One of my siblings told me, "it's called fart, not poof, ha ha ha!"

<<<This reminds me of the story in Genesis when Abram gets his name changed to Abraham.>>>

From then on, I use the word fart. Poof is long forgotten but when hearing it I recall those years in the beat-up depressing trailer on that God-forsaken piece of land.

God bless.

It's Warming this Week/Inspirational Thoughts

The seasons are changing back to warm soon and this week is proof of it. While we will probably get more snow it's quite a relief to know in a couple months we won't have to pay for oil for about five months or so. I'd like the winter much more if that wasn't an expense. Space heaters have done a swell job for me and the others in the house, especially the guy down the hall.

I get mixed feelings about the change of seasons. It's nice in a college town to see ladies strut their stuff in less clothing. This is quite refreshing. The prospect of forming a wiffle ball team this years seems better than ever. Also, I can once again wear tight tee-shirts and pants and no long johns. I'll sweat more, but that's okay. God-willing, I'll venture on a few road trips up north.

On the down side, baseball will be televised and hockey and football will be done. This is good though, it'll keep me away from the evil television. God-willing, I'll venture on a few road trips up north and maybe overseas if I can get some dough together.

The big downer with these change of seasons, whether it's summer to fall or winter to spring, it's a reminder I'm getting old. I felt this way even in grade school. It's a reminder that things move on and change. I think the older I get the more I embrace it, but I used to really like to cling to the past and that's very limiting.

While nothing is guaranteed, and I still have my fears about things, it kind of seems like things always get better.

The Meaning of Bowling

Many people dismiss bowling as a game for the masses. Others see it as a pass time for drunk people. The Polish people tend to thrive on it, and many others too. And although the game is presented in some of the worst cheesy packaging out there (shirts, shoes, bowling alley decor, etc), there is a deep and hidden meanings behind all of it.

Follow me now down the lane, will you?

The Bowler
The bowler is man (men and women/mankind), the common man, a protagonist going up against a cruel and hostile world. The pins seem small and off in the distance, often impossible to a beginner. The bowler is faced with a problem. The solution is destruction. His goal is to leave no pin standing.

The bowler has an approach. Likewise, we all must, in our own lives, figure out our own approach. The best approaches are those that involve an easy glide. Watch the pros. The message here is that its best to glide through life. Easy does it. Please don't confuse gliding with a lack of drive or motivation. The game is just telling you to take easy and relax. There isn't apathy.
Let's move on.

The Lane
This is an easy one. The lane is life. It's long and oily and has arrows to direct us on our path. It's best to stay in the center and balanced but the best life is a life well lived. It's human to get off the center. We all do. Understand, the best bowlers throw their balls dangerously close to the gutter only to have it hook perfectly in the pocket. Sometimes we fall into the gutter. This happens only if we go to far on either side of the lane. It happened to Keith Moon.

Don't let this happen to you.

The Ball
The ball is our energy. Is rotates, spins, hooks and knocks down anything in its path. Your energy (or spirit) has powers beyond your belief if you unleash it. Let it out baby! Do some damage! Create! Overthrow governments! Speak truth to power!

This is where it gets quite interesting. Allow me to unveil this. Watch now.

The Pins
Pins are the ultimate representation of power. They are pure, white, set up, standing upright, all in line, organized in quite a beautiful way. A triangle of ten. A number of completeness.

The lights shine down on them as if God were to give his blessing on royalty, as it was with the doctrine of divine right. Not unlike corporate and government powers of today, bowling pins have an arrogant sense of entitlement.

But, if you were to look at a pin closely, you'd see that it's not perfect, and full of flaws, dents, and scratches (I know this because, like my father, I've set pins, and I'm proud of it). When we inspect our government and the corporations its empowered you would see countless violations against natural law and anything that's decent through violence and coercion.

Do the pins have power over you? Talk to me after you missed that seven pin on an easy spare, or, after you've left a split standing. These things mess your head and seek to control you and reduce to an upset little child.

Don't let the pins control you.
So, What Are We To Do?
Whether it's our oppressors or pins, it's up to mankind to break off the shackles of control. We must be the protagonist, we must relax and glide, approach, use our energy to rise up and knock them down! Topple them as they will hopefully do in Egypt and the rest of Arabia. Never accept tyranny. Never let them check your "parts" when you take a flight. Demand to know where your tax money is going and who it is benefiting. Most importantly live your life and use your spirit to do something other than accepting what they give you.

Always stay out of the gutter.

Yours truly and forever - in this life or the next,
Dainty Bones.

Wrestling Memories

The other night I was at the local watering hole. It was around 1am. ESPN or ESPN Classic was on and they were airing old AWA matches. The gentlemen a few stools down started talking about it and this sparked a good old fun, lively (maybe a little drunk too), conversation.

I think a lot of nostalgic wrestling conversation always start or lead to the negative side of the sport. The number of early drug related or "shady" deaths of the "celebrities" is unmatched by any other occupation. These guys lived and partied like rock stars and in doing so did severe damage both chemically and physically to their bodies.

Curt Hennig, who I knew mainly as "Mr. Perfect" was one casualty who happened to be wrestling during our lively chat. Others that you might remember were:

Ms. Elizabeth - Pills
Dino Bravo - Shot in Montreal
Adorable Adrian Adonis - Car accident
Andre the Giant - he was too big
Owen Hart - Fell about 40 feet during a live event
Ravishing Rick Rude - Heart failure
***Look up the Von Erich family as this is too tragic for me to speak of. They have videos on this.

The movie "The Wrestler" did quite an outstanding job of portraying the life. This movie should be seen by all wrestling fans of the appropriate age.

Is there anything good about this "sport"?

Off the top of my head I can say it brought great joy to me, my friends, and my grandma. Her favorite was Ivan Putski, the Polish Hammer. My favorite was Ric Martel. Both of these guys are still alive I think. I know Ric is. Martel was an arrogant fashion model and also a great technical wrestler. I knew how to do the "Boston Crab", his signature move. Yes, we did go to some events to see him wrestle. Yes, I did spend one evening making signs. I'm not ashamed to admit any of this. ((Check the video below to see Martel))

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zm9AbH7CnBc

I would piss my friends off in 7th and 8th grade by insisting it was all real. I knew it wasn't, but back then I realized suspending disbelief would allow me to enjoy this thing on a far greater scale. Plus I just like pissing people off. I think I got this trait from my dad. He had a special knack for knowing what would get under our skin.. this is for another blog.

Another element to the "sport" that led to its popularity was that it played on stereotypes. During the middle east crisis you had the Iron Shiek. Towards the end of the cold war we had Boris Zukhov. Shortly after WWII you had Fritz von Erich, the German bomber. Fritz was the patriarch of the above mentioned tragic Von Erich (Adkisson) family. All of these enemies and their characters helped get us all fired up.

I'd be ignoring the greatest wrestler of all-time if I didn't mention Hulk Hogan. Hulk wasn't the most technically proficient wrestler but he could inspire the crowd like no one else. He played the role of the strong American. His theme song was "I am a real American." While there was a silliness to this character you couldn't help get excited about him. He was great in his interviews. He had a great tough voice and attitude. I remember almost being in tears when Mr. Wonderful turned on the Hulkster during a tag team and "beat the shit out of him" with Big John Stud and Andre the Giant (Bobby Heenan was behind all that). I felt helpless watching it all as a youngster. Hulk had a history of being "pearl harbored" as he'd call it. Someone would always turn on him. He was the best though.

So, in closing, some swell memories came to mind the other night at the bar. I hope this blog brought you some good warm feelings. Writing this during the snow put a smile on my face, recalling my youth. My god I'm getting old. I was blessed for having this staged sport in my life though, and good friends and family to share the excitement with. My heart goes out those who have passed as either good guys or bad guys and their families as well. While many folks in the business have led "shady" lives, they did get our juices flowing and our energy up. They got us excited. Thank you. Job well done.

(Below is a little bit on wrestler's deaths.)
http://prowrestling.about.com/od/whatsrealwhatsfake/a/wrestlersdeaths.htm

Hiatus.

I think my break from blogging has ended. There shall be more non insightful posts coming soon. Thanks to those who keep reading. I'm quite surprised at the popularity of the "time portal" blog. That seems to constantly be getting hits.

To keep you all posted, if anyone cares, I had a good holiday. I saw the family out west (PA), and we threw an outrageous New Years Party for those in K-town. We had some very special guests from the Lehigh Valley too. The party didn't end til 5am.

Turns out I wasn't motivated enough to make Peking Duck. I'd still like to learn how to make that.

We had a few great gigs and are looking forward to others. New songs are being generated as we speak. One song is about sleeping the other one is about nervousness.

I got to see the Steelers, my favorite all-time sports team get to their 8th Superbowl, and I got to hear a few Eagles fans whine about it. Those guys never learn. As exciting as that all was, it's important to always remember it really has no impact on my life, aside from some excitement. Kind of like the babes.

We had a nice break and now its back to work. Keep hitting this site for new posts.

Godbless.